I, ME & MYSELF.

When you think about yourself, what are the thoughts running through your mind, what do you feel… and how do you speak to yourself? One of the most powerful and important tools in your life is to notice the way you speak to yourself. It can alter the way you behave, what you do and how you do it. So how is your relationship with yourself? Is it severely critical… or are you able to cut yourself some slack? Is it very demeaning… or are you able to nurture all the parts of you that are still a work in progress? Take some time to really dig deep within and ask yourself these vital questions. For when you find your answers, you can decided what needs to change and what new and healthy patterns you would like to replace them with.

  1. How can we help others if we cannot help ourselves first?

When we think about ourselves, why is it that we are taught to feel guilty for putting ourselves first? Why can we not do things for ourselves like we would for a loved one? Why do we push our bodies to burnout and tire our brain to exhaustion? Where do we draw the line and how to we find that balance between self care and daily living. Quite frankly, if you cannot be there for yourself, how can you be there for others? And if you cannot be there for others it defeats the purpose of not taking care of yourself. We need to carve out time for ourselves in order to fill up our cups. When we try to help others whilst running empty, we are not adding, but taking away. So it is vital to be able to first learn to take care of yourself and then be able to do the same for others. And when you truly learn this, you will notice the difference in being there for others before and after you put in time for yourself.

2. How do you speak to yourself?

So let’s change the way we talk to ourselves. Mastering the mind and how you speak to yourself is vital in changing the way you feel and the things you do. It is all too easy for the critical part of our minds to speak out of turn, giving us this negative talk that we never knew we asked for. But how about we stand up for ourselves in these moments. Talk back to that inner critic and say “Hey! Stop that. I am good enough, I am worth it. Just because I make mistakes doesn’t mean i’m less, it just means i’m growing and learning. I am going to forgive myself rather than make myself feel worse”. Then you can bring in a more nurturing voice from within, guiding you, healing you and most importantly supporting you. The bumps along the way are opportunities to expand and reach further than you thought you could. It can be a challenge in itself, you do not need the added criticism. So be gentle with yourself. Notice the critic, stand up to it and then bring in the voice of nurturance.

3. How do we break free from the stereotype that putting yourself first is a selfish act?

I, Me & Myself… what a strong, powerful and courageous statement. So why is it frowned upon? Who made these rules and why must we go along with them? Putting yourself first does not mean neglecting your work life, not looking after your kids or being rude to people. Putting yourself first could be carving out some time in the day to do what nourishes your soul, it could be saying no to unhealthy habits, it could be setting boundaries for yourself and having the courage to follow through on them. The list goes on and will be different for everyone. The more we start to acknowledge our own well being, the more nourished we are on the inside. And the more nourishment we give ourselves, the more we start to flourish externally! When you are flourishing, you feel better, you are more able to be there for others, but most importantly, yourself.

4. How do you balance ‘Doing’ and ‘Being’?

Sometimes… all you need is a day to yourself, a day to just do nothing and be. To get out of the doing mode you found yourself in 24/7 and step into a space of rest and relaxation. To allow your mind to quiet down and let yourself be as you need to be. To do things that help you stay present and grounded, such as reading a book, drawing or even cooking. To allow your creative juices to flow and heal you from the inside out. We all need this, I just wish we learned the importance of it and started to make it more of a priority. Because it is important, to find the little things in life that bring us so much joy and to bask in it, even if it’s just for a little while.

5. How do you change your emotional beliefs toward yourself?

“I am worth the effort I put into myself”

We all deserve to carve out some special time for ourself that is of course Guilt-FREE! Why do we feel guilty about doing things for ourselves? When did we learn to be shameful of making our needs a priority? Guilt and shame go hand in hand. While guilt helps us on the morality scale, it can also be oh so detrimental to our journey to self love and self care. So how do we take the necessary time for ourselves without the guilt or the shame that often follows suit? I would suggest take time to sit with the feelings. Sit with them, acknowledge them and ask yourself why it is coming up for you and where or when you learned to feel this way. We are our own best teachers, if we learn to really listen to ourselves on a higher level, all the answers will come flooding in.

And with that I really do hope you find some I, Me and Myself time to just be what you need in the moment and learn to love the little things in life ❤

I Love You, Goodbye.

I love you, Goodbye is a beautiful term I like to use for all things that no longer serve me, for which I would like to lovingly remove from my life. Whether it be mentally, socially, physically or even romantically… To be able to honour yourself enough to realise what it is that needs to be let go off and taking the correct steps to make that happen.

More often than not, what we want and what we need are not always in alignment with each other. One is for our better and the other… not so much. One helps us in short term gains and the other helps us in the long run. So what is the difference between our wants and needs? Where do we draw the line between the two? And how do we start to live a life filled with more meaning? For example, you have been invited out with friends, but your body is pleading with you to have a night in. Do you go with your desire to meet your friends, or do you honour your bodies needs and take it easy? Going out will leave your burnt out, whereas staying in could recharge you. This example carries on into your personal life, professional career and in setting a healthy lifestyle for yourself. All in all it is about prioritising yourself and putting yourself first. To learn how to take care of yourself and love yourself whole. To gently remind yourself in a situation “I love you, Goodbye”. Let go with kindness. To have the awareness and self discipline to acknowledge and remind yourself that this is not serving my highest good and so I let it go with love.

Another example of living a more self empowered life would be to say “I do not need a romantic partner but I do want to share my life with someone”. This takes away any sort of inner power you may be giving away unknowingly. To know that you are completely capable of standing tall on your own and meeting your own needs… but it is always nice to, in addition, have that romantic connection. Therefore your romantic partner is not a substitute for all the aspects in your life you may feel are lacking. If you seek out a person to pick up the pieces for you, and things don’t work out… it will leave you in pieces, as they take away the glue that was holding you together. And so, if you work towards healing all those parts of you first and consequently find a partner to add to your life, you are more well rounded and better able to move through situations or challenges that come your way. Why? Because you committed to yourself first. By saying “I love you, Goodbye” to seeking external quick fixes… and going within to heal. By building stronger foundations for yourself, allowing you to feel more grounded, secure and lovingly whole.

So why not let go of all that no longer serves you and your highest good. Take time to really ground yourself in the present moment. Think of all the aspects of your life you feel you have outgrown. What doesn’t feel so good anymore? What tasks feel like chores? What thoughts or emotions have brought you down for far too long? Make a list of all of these things, and then consciously and courageously say…. “I love you, Goodbye” to them. It is a choice. Acknowledge your need to move through it all and step in to a better space for yourself and all that surround you.

For example, when you are in a romantic relationship that is not healthy for either one of you… you see the signs, you even feel them, but a part of you will hold on for dear life, for fear of change or the fear of not finding any better. However, when you are able to muster enough self worth, self love and self respect for yourself to realise that this is no longer serving your highest good… and you are willing to act on it, you can free yourself by saying “I love you, Goodbye” to the situation.

And so it boils down to who you choose to surround yourself with, how you choose to honour your health and fitness, the amount of self discipline you exercise and your goals and intentions… Dreaming big and making it happen! It all starts with a simple question. “Do I really want to do this, or do I need to do something else?”. To Choose to move through what is not working for you with love and starting anew with self care, self love and putting yourself first sometimes.

In order to embody the “I love you, Goodbye”, we must learn to move on with love. It is important to gain the perception of loving natural change. Never being afraid to say goodbye to a chapter in your life that has past its expiration date, and to be able to gracefully turn the page and enter into a new and fresh beginning. Saying goodbye to old and past patterns that either have you stuck or hold you back… and having the love and courage to move through it and into the freedom of fresh and new abundance.

So take a moment to really sit with yourself and reflect on all the aspects of your life you feel you may have outgrown, all that you carry that may be past its time and think about where you want to go in your present and future. What do you want… and what do you need? It all comes down to a choice. A sort of filtering out all that holds you back and making the conscious decision to be a better version of yourself, a more evolved you as you change through the times and learn and grow.

Therefore I love you, Goodbye is a little reminder to move through times with love. Cherish all your experiences and you will eventually move through them. Enjoy them while they last, flow through the good, push through the hard and have the gentle grace to say goodbye when you know it is time to. To allow yourself to be open to the excitement of “what’s next”.

Feeling, Dealing and Healing✨

In order to heal you need to deal… and in order deal you need to feel. Feeling our emotions, especially the ones that are difficult, is one of the most uncomfortable of feelings. But once you do, the amount of emotional, physical and spiritual transformation you experience is otherworldly. Transformation of all past patterns, wounds, emotional blocks and so on. Transformation into a version of you that is not held down by all the baggage that once weighed on you. A version of you that is lighter, happier and definitely more authentic to who you truly are.

When you deal with your emotions by feeling them, you take away their power through confronting them, and sitting with them. It is in avoidance, where you either let the fear of feeling them build and build, or the emotion/ situation stays with you for so long that it begins to feel like it is a part of you… when in truth it is definitely not. We as human beings often tend to get stuck in our comfort zones. Even if our comfort zone is sitting in discomfort, we will do so, as we fear change more than we fear dealing with what it is that truly holds us back.

Change is vital if you want to grow, and growth is paramount to healing. This equation is quite simple when you look at it in a broader sense, but often takes much courage and bravery to master. It takes a lot of inner work and strength from within to be able to become aware of the aspects of ourselves we need to heal, and then taking the necessary steps in doing so. Sometimes it’s all about sitting with the emotions that come up when we are triggered by certain situations, sometimes it’s sitting with thoughts that randomly pop up. Instead of pushing the thoughts away, which only gives them more fuel to grow bigger, why don’t you try to think the thought through. Notice what emotions come up with the thought and sit with it in stillness. Ground yourself in it, feel through the emotions and begin to see the thought for what it truly is… merely a thought. When you take away the power a thought has over you, you take back and claim your strength. You empower yourself to stand tall and learn to navigate through the depths of your subconscious mentality. Thoughts are only scary if you give them that power.

Healing is not always easy, it takes true dedication to go through the work but oh how it is SO worth it!!! To feel light and feather like. To feel immense freedom from what it was that held you back for far to long. Dealing takes alot of courage. In order to deal, we first need to accept that there is something the lies beneath the surface, waiting to come up and out. To be able to feel through it and let it go. Dealing requires our attention and focus. It requires true determination and a willingness to want to get better and feel better. Sometimes the only way to reach that destination, is to go through it, in the literal sense. You have to face your feelings, nurture them, get to know them and learn to befriend them. To acknowledge that there are things within us that are craving to be seen and heard. They want to be acknowledged so that they can move through you and out of you. But it requires the courage to sit with the discomfort that most often will pop up. That courage will come from a place of sheer strength and direction.

And when you start to move through each and every part of you that is wounded, you start to create space within yourself. With that space, you have the power to fill it up with beautifully nourishing things. It may vary from person to person. It could look like building new and uplifting friendships, learning something new, becoming more creative, picking up hobbies that light your soul up from within or learning to enjoy your own company.

Healing is no linear journey. It is filled with cracks, crevices, bumps and swerves. But in the end, you manage to reach your destination. And when you have climbed that mountain, you do feel a deep sense of accomplishment. It gives you great confidence to then move on to dealing with and healing another part of you. And as you start to heal more and more, you start to change your life for the better. You free yourself up to be more of your authentic self, living a lighter and brighter life.

So to all those that are on the journey of feeling, dealing and healing… keep going! The beauty that lies beyond is incredibly worth it and oh so satisfying!

The Art Of Balance

Balance, equilibrium, symmetry, stability… what do these words represent and what does it mean? Balance, the idea that you cannot have one without the other for stability. Today we will be shedding light on how balance is crucial in all of life’s experiences. You cannot have good without knowing bad, you cannot know happiness without knowing a sense of sadness. Where there is loss, gain is not too far behind. Fear and excitement, tragedy and love, without one, how could you possibly and truly know the other? They go hand in hand, like two peas in a pod!

So when you fear loss, know that gain is never too far away. It is part of growth. When we let go of our false sense of control, we can take a step back and really strive for equilibrium. To have the courage to feel or experience the discomfort knowing that better days are ahead. To know that without one I cannot possibly feel the other!

And so balance can come in many different shapes and sizes. Emotional balance as I spoke about earlier comes with experience, and a deep understanding. It stems from emotional regulation and the idea that we are not our emotions, simply beings that experience emotions as they come and go. Some stay for a while… and others come and go in a flash. Emotion can be tricky but through breathe work, we could really learn to master our emotions. Find a balance between our emotions as they flow naturally through our being.

Physical balance relates to your relationship with your body and your own physicality. How you view your body, yourself and most importantly how you talk to your body. Physical balance also comes from taking care of your body, how you view your weight, what you feed your body, how you sleep and so on. In a sense, a form of self care.

It is important to have a good balance of a range of people around you and in your social circle. To have people you can laugh with, cry with, dance with and even be goofy with. You do not have to find all of these things in just one person. That is the beauty of it. To have people in your life that you can bond over certain parts of each others personalities with. A good group of cathartic friends who uplift, support and belong with each other.

Balance as a paradox is an interesting theme. Balance teaches us that we as humans are able to feel a whole range of emotions at the same time. To be in a situation where you feel daunted yet freedom, intimidated yet comforted. When we can accept that we feel these emotions at the same time, we win more than half the battle. As we often feel that we cannot experience both together, but why not? Feel it, embrace it, because it will soon pass, so enjoy the experience for what it is!

The art of balance is about learning to move through the waves with grace and to learn to exercise a little bit of detachment toward the emotions we feel, learning that they are hear to teach us vital lessons, rather than getting wrapped up in them and creating endless cycles for ourselves. Like they say… “Push through the hard, and flow through the good”. It is all about perspective. What makes good good and bad bad? What if for you, what is good is someone else’s bad and vice versa? So can we not change our mindset and spin things around just a little bit? Why do difficult or uncomfortable emotions or situations have to be bad? If you say “It is happening FOR me and not TO me” You learn to exercise gratitude towards your situation. And when you look back at the situation that has passed you feel a deep sense of gratitude for what you went through because you would not be the strong, empowered individual that you are today having not experienced what you did. It is all about balance, yet it is also about perspective.

Balance is more often than not linked to awareness. The awareness to know when you are off balance, what end of the scale you feel you have tipped toward and how to get yourself back to equilibrium. It’s about knowing yourself, your values, your strengths and weaknesses. It’s about knowing where you stand and where you are headed. When you feel your self on a detour from your path, life has a funny yet incredible way of putting us back on track. They call it a “detour in the right direction”. Sometimes you have to veer off in order to come back into alignment. The amount of knowledge and experience you gain from a detour is unbelievable! So sometimes when you are learning, it’s ok not to be in balance. The learning lies in witnessing your imbalance and taking the steps to get yourself back time and time again.

So it really is all about getting playful with it. There is no right or wrong because at the end of the day, we are all just here to learn! I hope you find the balance that you are looking for in the life that you lead… Lots of love ❤

Becoming Authentic

People pleasing is such an underrated occurrence that is either rarely spoken about or a thing not many of us are even aware that we do. I feel that this sort of behaviour is something we learn in our lives to fill a deep void from within. It comes from a place of lack and emptiness and we try to fill it up by moulding ourselves into a being that we feel others may like or approve of. People pleasing is one of the most common self sabotaging behaviours. So I would like to shed some light on the matter in the hopes to help myself and others to work toward stepping out of this behaviour and into a more authentic and fulfilling way of being.

So what may people pleasing look like? It can vary from person to person… but it would most commonly be trying to fit in with the crowd, trying to be like others, or be liked by others. Going along with trends not because we genuinely like them, but because we think others may like them. Wearing clothes you feel others may approve of without stopping to ask yourself whether you like them. Ordering food on a menu based on what others around you are eating. Changing your accent to fit in with the crowd around you as you are afraid to stand out and be different, all the while stepping further and further away from yourself. Saying things or agreeing with other’s opinions without taking the time to ask yourself what your opinions on the matter may be. Doing something only because you know that if you don’t, it would inconvenience the other person and so you put their needs before your own. Honestly, the list goes on and on.

There are so many different forms and fashions, it is hard to keep up with them all! And maybe a few of these examples sound familiar to you. People pleasing is something that we all know exists but for some reason, none of us talk about it. Why is that? Why are we not promoting our own individuality? The more we please others, the more we move further away from ourselves. When we start to lose ourselves, when we do not even recognise ourselves… There will definitely come a point of overwhelm for the fact that you are so lost, you don’t even know who you are anymore. What your likes or dislikes are, what clothes you like to wear, what your actual accent may sound like (the one you hear in your head), your opinions and observations that are true to you and not someone else. It all starts with awareness and a gentle curiosity for wanting to get to know yourself.

So how do we start to get to know ourselves? We start by asking ourselves the most basic questions. If you were to block everyone else out, if you knew you wouldn’t be judged and if you had no worries about fitting in… This can be done in solitude. It could be a trivia of different questions. You can get creative with it. When you meet someone for the first time, what would you ask them? How would you try to get to know them? Then start to do the same for yourself. You can start with your likes and dislikes, then move on to your opinions on certain matters. What are your values as a person? What standards would you like to live by? How would you like others to treat you, and then try and incorporate that into how you interact with others.

It all comes down to going on a quest to not only find yourself and who you are but also in loving yourself and every part that you discover. It’s about getting to know yourself. You could be at the age of 50 and still not truly know who you are. It is a process, but one of such deep satisfaction and loving acceptance, it is definitely worth it. When you start to accept who you are as a person, you won’t care whether other people accept you or not. You will reach a stage where you will have so much self worth and respect for yourself where you can understand that others opinions, ways of being may differ to you. You could either learn to compromise and live with that or you could understand and let them go with the understanding that they are not your type of person. That there are so many people in this world, you cannot possibly be liked by everyone or be similar to everyone. To understand that you will find your own people. And when you start to own who you are… you start to attract people who are compatible to who that is. You start to attract people who are also authentically true to themselves too, paving a way for a more fulfilling, happy and free life. Does that not sound great?

This journey requires a lot of awareness on the acceptance of who you are. You can only truly accept all parts of you when you love all parts of you. Especially the parts that are no way near perfect. To say “I love myself… quirks and all” That’s what makes you special, and sets you apart from others. Sometimes we feel comfort in fitting in as we do not like the added attention we get when we start to become truly authentic. Authenticity is so attractive to people because more often than not, it is what so many people crave but don’t realise that they can too be true to themselves and live in their authenticity. Why not? So it starts with one, who inspires another and then another… all in all spurring on a path for others to really dive deep within themselves to discover and get to know who they truly are and to love and accept themselves for it.

So I hope you enjoy the beauty of getting to know yourself, to befriend yourself, enjoy your own company, understand yourself. It is a beautiful process, and I do know that we all need to give ourselves a little more attentive kindness and nourishment along the way.

Understanding Avoidance

Avoidance is a strategy almost all of us use, and for many reasons… Sometimes we use it to avoid discomfort, sometimes to avoid uncomfortable emotions or situations, and other times because there is something deeper spurring that avoidance behaviour on. It is only when we dig deep and understand why or what it is that is triggering the avoidance, can we come up with creative solutions to move past them. Beyond avoidance comes growth and quite possibly an immense sense of freedom. So why not choose to be free, let loose and fly.

Often sitting in silence, just breathing and remaining still can help quiet the mind and expand your awareness so that the answers can come flooding in. It’s always the calm bellow the surface that knows all. Trust in that inner voice of guidance. And then ask yourself, what is spurring this sense of avoidance on? Why does it make me feel this way? And what can I do about it?

Sometimes there are painful emotions triggered by whatever situation you are trying to avoid. It is always helpful to feel them through and release them so that they cannot control you or your behaviour any longer. And when you do, what a freeing and magical feeling it is! Release! let go! Live life in a perfect flow! A few ways to release these emotions is to breathe through them, journal it out or you could even perform any sort of physical exercise with the intention of releasing any and all emotional energy that no longer serves your best and highest good!

Sometimes a situation from your past may cause you to avoid putting yourself in a similar situation in your future. In these situations, we need the gentle reminder that just because we had a bad experience the first time, does NOT mean its guaranteed to be the same the second time around. For example, sometimes when we get out of an unhealthy relationship, we fear creating such attachments in the future for fear of going through the same. I would like to shed light on the fact that you are so much smarter, wiser and stronger than you were in your past. You have the strong advantage of having gone through the experience the first time. You learned where you went wrong and the things you could do differently the next time around. You are smarter, wiser and stronger. You attract for yourself what you want and deserve. Who says it would be like your first experience? Maybe the second time around would be absolutely wonderful? Trust in that. And trust that even if its not a good experience the second time around, at least you tried? You learned, you grew and you expanded. But how will you know if you avoid it? So why not just go for it!

When the same situations keep occurring there is often and important lesson to learn in them. Avoidance will only delay what you are meant to learn. So why not just push through it? Be gentle and kind with yourself through it all. Kindness and compassion for yourself and your emotions is so very important. Without these we feel alone. You are not alone at all. You have got this! You will be rewarded so beautifully when you take the time to heal yourself. To put yourself out there and take the time to grow and learn as you go along your path!

Lots of love and warmth always ❤

A Kiss…

A kiss… Oh! what a beautiful thing. An act so magical, communicative and wildly bewildering. Where two beings share a moment in time together… getting lost in each other, knowing not where one begins and the other ends. A Kiss… where two collide to become one. Beauty personified. A kiss could convey the stars and beyond without breathing a single word. Actions speak louder than words, well, then it’s time to kiss and tell. 

There is something so beautiful in a romantic connection. A wonderful chemistry of energy between the two, dancing and flowing, creating a passionate masterpiece. One where sparks fly, stomachs churn and love burns through with such passion that nothing separates the two. A kiss can convey all this and more in just a matter of seconds. 

A kiss, somewhere to get lost, a place you never want to return from, for when you do, when you look into their eyes, you feel completely overwhelmed with that sense of deep belonging. The sense that this is where I’m supposed to be. Right here, right now in this very moment. A sense that this moment will hold with you forever, a feeling of contentment, satisfaction and overwhelming gratitude for what you see before you, a beautiful soul, with a beautiful personality, and someone to stand by your side whilst you flow through life. 

A kiss, oh how swoon worthy a kiss can be, to feel your emotions dancing within yourself and dancing within yours truly. To have each others emotions dancing together… Melding and flowing to create a unique magical love. A love that is strong, passionate, electrifying and overwhelmingly stunning. A love that heals, a love that grows, a love that inspires and uplifts! Together the two of you inspire and uplift each other to be the best versions of yourselves. To embody the essence of your higher self and shine your bright light wherever you choose to go. Together your love can inspire others to reach for the same. And one by one, spreading love, touching lives with the gentle curiosity of finding out what it would be like to live a bright beautiful life whilst having a beautiful soul by your side. And it all starts with a kiss… A kiss for love and a kiss for life ❤

Not Enough?

I think at some point in your lives, we have all felt like either we were not enough or that we were not doing enough with our lives. However how much is enough? Where do we draw that line? And how do we find a balance? When will we be enough and when will we feel satisfied with ourselves enough to say I love my work, what i’m doing and how much i’m doing. When did we learn to put pressure on ourselves to keep climbing that mountain and how long until we burn out? These are vital questions to ask yourself as in these answers you will be able to delve deep enough within yourself to learn to heal these parts of you that may feel a sense of inadequacy.

Feelings of inadequacy are not uncommon. It could be anything about ourselves. Our looks, clothes, personality, or what we feel we lack. And more often than not, we find ourselves comparing our own qualities to that of others, only leading us to feel even worse about ourselves. The thoughts that pop up could sound like “Why can’t I have what they have” “I would be so happy if I was like that/looked like that/dressed like that” “She is so pretty, why did I have to end up looking like this?” “This person is doing so much with his life and what do I have to show for mine?” This thought pattern doesn’t do anything but create feelings of longing, inadequacy and lack. The idea is not so much to compare, but to start to learn to accept who you are, how you look, how you dress and what you do. This can be quite tricky at times, but in the end you start to compare less and you find yourself leaning more towards gratitude. Gratitude for who you are, what you have, your accomplishments and the adventures you are yet to embark on!

A great exercise to get yourself out of comparing is to think of the bigger picture! Does this little comparison really matter in the grand scheme of things? In a week, month or year from now will this matter? So in a year from now when I remember this moment, what do I want to take from it? Do I want to remember feelings of inadequacy? Or do I want to remember feelings of empowerment? To say I thank this situation for teaching me that I am enough. I don’t need what others have. Instead I focus on my own journey, my own path in my life and strive to make it more fulfilling for myself. To do better for myself, not because I see someone else doing so, but to nourish my own life and to live to the fullest of my capabilities.

And as for the lack of feeling satisfied in your life’s work, sometimes your life slows down in order for you to take a step back and work on yourself. To heal your insides, give yourself the attention that you need in order to build yourself back up into the strong capable person ready to get back out there and shine bright! Soon, the feelings of satisfaction will come naturally when you follow your heart and your passions, when you seek out what you desire. The job, the clients, the friends, that ‘whole’ feeling.

Sometimes patience really is key. To have the ability to wait for how you want your life to be. What is meant for you will come to you when the time is right. Who knows when that might be, but in the mean time, work on yourself. Strive to be the best version of yourself you can be. Your best and highest self! And let life flow to you and through you. As you have the ability to exercise patience, you let go of control and surrender to the present moment. Finding a sense of peace and satisfaction in all that you currently have, while feeling optimistic and excited for what is yet to come!

So don’t let one week, month or year get you down! Because you ARE enough! And all that you are doing for now IS enough. Everyone moves at their own pace. The idea is not how fast you are going but that you reach the finish line, and then start all over again! Because there is always something new to learn and discover.

So I just wanted to say that you are where you need to be and who you need to be at this very moment and that is more than enough 🙂

You Are Whole.

We’ve all had those days… The ones where you don’t feel like getting up. Where you don’t feel like doing anything at all. When doing even the littlest thing can feel like climbing over a mountain. When you know what you need to do to get yourself out of this funk but you just can’t bring yourself to do it. When you feel that your are in this situation, it is important to understand and accept how you are feeling. How you feel is very valid. It is important to note what your body is trying to tell you, what your emotions are trying to tell you. When you acknowledge what you are feeling and get to the root of why you feel this way, you have won more than half the battle! And once you have pin pointed what and why you feel this way, you have given yourself the compassion and understanding that a very large part of you was craving deep down. When you acknowledge and accept, you are able to get out of your own way and let things flow through you as they naturally would.

We all go through those days, weeks and months! They are filled with growth and learning! When you start to become aware of why these situations are placed in your life, they start to get easier. When we listen, we can understand and when we understand, we can feel through it and move ever so on. Move on and forward with our lives, evolving, shining and loving bright!

We need to start to learning to love the process rather than focusing on the result. When we focus on the process, our reward is the beautiful result. So let’s bring some more awareness into our lives. What are situations among us here to bring to our attention? What do we need to really open our eyes to and see clearly? What can we let go of? And how can we let go of judgement and expand our view or perception of the world around us?

When we change the way we view things, we essentially change the way we feel and in turn change the way we live too. Our entire world starts to shift for the better. Just remember that only you can pick yourself up, only you can fill that void inside of you and only you can make yourself feel whole. It is important to understand that you are whole! You don’t need to look externally for that feeling. When you empower yourself to stand tall, you allow yourself to accept and acknowledge that you are very much and entirely whole as one.

When you feel lonely, when you feel a little bit less whole, it is important to acknowledge all the aspects of your life that make you feel that way, and start to incorporate ways in which you can nourish your inner being. To find ways to fill yourself up with an abundance of love and joy. So how can you do that for yourself? Some ways to nourish yourself could be being one with nature, exercising, practicing a hobby, going for a class you enjoy, being mindful, meditating, laughing, singing, dancing… and so on. When you feel lonely it is important to fill yourself up on the inside rather than searching for external sources, as while they may make you feel better for a little while, it sometimes tends to be a fleeting sensation. Wouldn’t it make you feel better to know that you could give that to yourself? While it is very important to also engage in external sources for happiness as we humans are social beings, it would be so lovely to also know that you are not relying on that entirely. You can handle it yourself, you’ve got this!

So I hope this makes you feel better and a little less lonely as you need to remind yourself that You Are Whole! Lots of love…

Finding Freedom 🕊️

Freedom, a word which is quite often underrated can quite possibly be the key to alot of breakthroughs! Freedom comes in many different forms and fashions, however understanding freedom and what it means to feel free is elite in itself. It is the power to think, act, feel how one wants without restraint. When searching deep within oneself, it’s important to factor in the term freedom. What does it mean? How do I feel about it? Have I ever known what freedom feels like? Then its important to ask yourself… Well do I feel free? What holds me back? What weighs on my shoulders and drags me down? What would it feel like if I were to be free from it? To unlock the chains that drag you down or hold you back?

The first step to finding freedom, would be to understand freedom. The feeling, the emotion, it’s symbolism, what aspects of your life you feel freedom and where you may lack it. Just like happiness and joy, freedom plays a huge role in finding meaning to life, in feeling uplifted and full of energy!

Some, I would call the worriers who worry themselves away into an endless loop of what if’s, doubts and maybe not’s. I know this cycle all too well and it’s easy to fall into this trap where thoughts take over and simultaneously have your emotions follow in its footsteps. Feeling fear, worry, doubt and maybe shame. How do you break the cycle? How do you break these chains that hold you back emotionally? I would say, it would be the art of finding freedom. Freedom from your thoughts, freedom from your emotions, just freedom in all that you do. One could say it is the freedom from identifying with the thoughts running through our minds or emotions flowing through our bodies that do not serve our highest good. It is more than a mindset, it is a lifestyle. To not only think freely, but to feel free and act with freedom. To have every action of your governed by love and freedom rather than fear or worry.

Growing up and living through our lives, we all experience a range of different experiences and situations. Some good, some bad and some absolutely beautiful. Whatever they may be, they all shape us. It is however our choice of how these situations mould us. Do we want them to hold us back? Or do we want to learn from them. To grow and expand and shine brighter than ever before because of them. From all of our experiences, it is only natural for us to from our own beliefs and perceptions about ourselves and the world around us. Some of these beliefs can be quite debilitating to our mental state. For example the “I’m not good enough” “What if I get rejected?” “Am I competent?” “I’d rather not because I’m scared…”. These are a few beliefs that limit us from reaching our full potential, from finding freedom.

The key to freeing ourselves is to become aware of these beliefs that we hold, to dig deep within ourselves, to figure out which emotions are triggered by which beliefs that we hold and whether they are serving our highest good or not. To ask yourself what kind of situations trigger these beliefs and how can I rewrite them to help change my perspective to a more positive and uplifting one. Essentially how can I free myself from the beliefs I hold that weigh me down?

Sometimes emotional baggage can be rough. It plays such a huge role in how we live our lives, the decisions that we make, and the path that we take. It is up to us to find the courage and confidence in our ability to be able to heal our emotions, to come to terms with our past and to learn that just because you experienced whatever you did in the past, does not mean it needs to influence your present OR your future. That is where you have the definitive choice. To either stay stuck in your past beliefs, experiences, feelings etc OR to free yourself from all that holds you back. From all that weighs on you.

For some of us, the courage to step out of our comfort zone can be quite a task. Even if our comfort zone may be a constant state of worry… or the inability to take beautiful risks. What if breaking out of your comfort zone means finding your freedom? What if it means finally freeing yourself from fear, from guilt, from shame, from self-criticism and from doubt and longing. Freedom can be a beautiful thing. If only more of us had the courage to strive for it. I certainly am trying and believe me, sometimes I feel it is the key to true happiness and abundance.

Freedom could even look like freedom from judgement, for example free from judging others but also from the judgement of others. In other words, this sort of freedom comes with a deep acceptance of oneself. Sort of saying “I completely love and accept myself” so whatever anyone else thinks of me is inconsequential. And of course when you love and accept yourself, it is a tiny bit easier to love and accept others for their truth and authenticity.

Let’s talk about freedom in relationships. To free yourself from the ever creeping toxicities that sometimes arise creating a rather unhealthy relationship. Freedom from jealousy, control and clinging are just a few. The real freedom comes from trust, compromise, communication, loyalty, compassion. The list goes on. To be free in a relationship is to be your authentic self, to live an authentic life and as a bonus, to have the addition of someone to share your life with. So that they do not take away from you, yet you do not take away from them. The idea that you do not need each other to exist, rather you want and chose to be with each other. I find a sort of beauty in that. It feels uplifting and nourishing rather than stifling and lacking.

Finding freedom from your inner critic is a important too. We all have that one voice in our heads telling us off, or shouting at us for what we did or didn’t do. For our regrets, for what we feel shameful for. It can be hard to live with that kind of inner roommate. The first step in this case is to acknowledge that you are not alone. This is a common issue, and so many are governed by this inner critic. But why? If only we could adopt a kinder, more nurturing and compassionate voice. One that offers forgiveness for our mistakes and offer understanding for our shortcomings. Finding freedom from our inner critic, requires a constant awareness of our inner voice and what it is saying. How it is influencing our emotions and our actions as well. The whole idea is to recognise when your inner critic is on a role and to choose better for yourself. It is important to realise that we do have control over how we speak to ourselves! To be firm and demand better, more nurturing, more nourishment, more love. And who better to give it to you than yourself!

So I hope this little piece, helps and guides you into the beautiful journey of finding ones freedom. Whatever that may be or feel for you. Whether it’s going for a swim, practicing a martial art, painting, practicing a hobby, being in nature, adopting a completely different lifestyle, changing your mindset, or even taking space from an environment that holds you back. Whatever it may be, I wish you all the very best and hope that more people have the wonderful opportunity of being free.